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Ten Things I Thank My Past Self For the Life I Have Now

I had a dream this week where I was living in an emotionally abusive situation, one I used to be in but got out of in real life. In my dream I was desperately trying to find a way to contact my husband. In my dream he was somewhere far away trying to get a place for us to live. I won't go into detail about what happened in the dream but it was one of those where I woke up with a pounding heart thinking I was still in the dream world.
The warmth of reality soaked into my trembling muscles and I realized it was just a dream. But the experience was more than just waking up from a bad dream. As I remembered all the things in my life that were real, I was overwhelmed with a feeling of gratitude for many of the realities in my life.
Compared to the places I’ve been in the past, I’m not over exaggerating when I say I am the most happy I have ever been in my entire life.
And while some of the things in my life changed because the tide of life and circumstances changed for the better, the…
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I'll Fantasize About You if You'll Fantasize About Me: Some thoughts on fantasizing about people you know

A couple years ago I was catching up with a friend from high school. Perhaps it won't be surprising that the conversation wended around to sex as it is wont to do with your friendly Unlaced Librarian. We got to talking about who we had crushes on and who we had fantasized about growing up in our teens and early adulthood. I ended up confessing to the person that I had thought about them. The person then told me that they had thought about me too and that it was something they never thought we would ever talk about.
But I'm glad we were able to talk about it. 
Nothing happened because we revealed these secrets. It wasn't awkward or some move to try to get us to leave our significant others. Indeed we haven't seen each other in over a year now and I doubt I will see them again any time soon.
But the exchange did make me wonder how often two people fantasize about each other.
I've imagined bursts of sexy scenarios for all sorts of people. I know how easy it is to crush on…

Working For It

I saw the phrase "Don't wish for it, work for it" on social media somewhere last week. I don't even remember where I saw it, but the phrase really stuck with me. From some googling I found the phrase possibly began as a meme from the fitness/working out scene, a context of which I have no experience or opinion. But of course I applied the phrase to my writing.

The phrase initially stuck with me because for the first time in my life I am in a position to work for my writing in a quality way.

In the past "working for it" basically meant bleeding ink to survive. I can't believe some of the things I have endured in my life and kept going only because I had words written on a piece of paper shoved in my pocket.

And those days were important. I was broke and sick and in pain and worried about fulfilling my basic needs. But I was working on my craft, learning, building, gathering experience and fixing my shortcomings as a writer.

Now I feel so grateful that t…

Self Care Selfies, Instagram, and a shot at happiness.

This year has gone by fast. For me, this spring and summer has been a warm welcome back to life. I’ve emerged from a period of time that I will look back on as being one of the worst years of my life.
I’m not trying to be dramatic when I say that, except for the five days I spent in Los Angeles, there was not a single day in 2017 that I felt truly happy. The period of July 2017 through January 2018 is when I finally hit bottom, after a decline that had been taking place for at least a year before.

I won’t go into much detail, but this time in my life was due primarily to a toxic Day Job and a flare up of my health issues. At the beginning of 2018, these became so bad that I was forced to move. I was let go from my Day Job. By some miraculous karma in the Universe, it was the same week a position at a library opened. I was able to return to the work that makes me genuinely happy. And it has given me the ability to properly take care of my health—both my physical and mental health.


Why I Write Male Pregnancy Romance

After what feels like an eternity of working on my debut male pregnancy romance, Brought Forth is now out in both print and ebook!

I have published the book under a new pen name: Josie Finch. Some people have asked me why I decided to use another pen name. Really, the only reason is that Mpreg is its own genre and it will be easier for readers to find my books.

Along with my sex education work, my writing as Leandra Vane falls into basically two categories: Polyamorous erotic romance and Kinky erotic romance. The books I’m writing under Josie Finch will all be a sweeter romance, have angels and other spiritual figures, and be, obviously, Mpreg.

I’m not ashamed of writing Mpreg romance, nor am I going to treat them as a side project. True enough, the book started as a side project, but now I have launched it and will continue to write in the genre. I’m promoting the books I write as Josie Finch along with all the other books I will continue to write.

But some people might still wond…

New Release! "Brought Forth" Writing as Josie Finch

The Kindle ebook edition of my new romance "Brought Forth" is now available! Print edition is also out now
"Brought Forth" is a M/M sweet romance and a novel length, non-shifter male pregnancy story. I will be writing more Mpreg (male pregnancy) romances as Josie Finch alongside my work as Leandra Vane. 
Read a blurb of my new book below!
Henry Merrill escaped the abusive family from his childhood and has built a life as the kindhearted handyman for the small town of Ashford in the 1880’s. Henry has every intention of living his life alone, serving the town he considers home. But an angel named Cory-Elle has other plans for Henry. With a soul that needs to be brought to earth, Cory-Elle gives Henry the opportunity to raise the family he never imagined he would have.

Dr. Lawrence Turner has a bad reputation in Ashford for attending to poor patients who cannot pay him and for being the only physician the town has ever seen make house calls to the local brothel. So when…

Happy Masturbation Month 2018!

It's MASTURBATION MONTH, lovely readers. I'm so very excited because masturbation is one of my most cherished sexual outlets. Unfortunately, I didn't always have such a good relationship with masturbation. I saw it as something shameful, as something "less" than other sexual outlets, and the subjects of my sexual fantasies often left me confused or once again, ashamed.

Examining sexual fantasy, learning about my body, and understanding more about how erotic media is produced were all processes I had to work through to have a better sex life and to enjoy all my sexual outlets. Which is why I still work to promote great non-fiction sexuality books and sex-ed resources as much as I can.

But for today, I want to offer some further reading for masturbation specifically.

As a person who can think myself off, I rely on sexual fantasy and erotic media like erotica and porn to masturbate and own relatively few sex toys. But that's all right! Part of my message about …